The Good Fight

"Si vis pacem, para bellum " -Latin proverb. 

Ah, harassment. When we were growing up, passive-aggressiveness did not form part of our rugged way of life. You'd treat one another like men because that was what we were even as boys, or what we played to be. Allow me to explain: there was no need to be discreet in your approach, guys would tease one another back and forth, laugh it out most of the time and rarely get into fights over it. The next day, everything was forgotten. This way of settling our affairs worked well, we better not cross others in a dishonorable way, not because we feared hurting each others' feelings, but, quite frankly, we thought it unmanly. 

Here in the States, if you want to, you can make fun of other kids, but there are repercussions if the kids get into a fistfight. It is a big deal to show physical violence, so boys resort to downplay their offenses. If the boy in question is larger and stronger than the other, then there's an opportunity to bully others. And bullying usually disappeared once we left high school. The fights I witnessed in high school were often unfair, teens would gang up on a particular kid or big kids would pick on smaller kids (again, bullying). It was unfair, something I didn't get to experience back home. 

Harassment is passive-aggressive, it happens in more subtle ways, but like a drop of water that overtime drills a hole on the sturdy rock, it can add its corrosiveness and become not so subtle. We hate it, but not because it harms us but because it is annoying, chronic, and you can't settle it violently. Making a big deal out of physical violence created it and made it far worse. 

We may not realize it sometimes when we are doing it, or when it concerns others, but we can recognize it on an intimate level, if others find something bothers you, then they will use it again and again and you better not get tired of hearing it because they will say it again and again. We pretend is mostly coincidental, and oftentimes it is. When it is widespread, it can have debilitating consequences, especially if you take it to heart. 

In some cases, it is rampant and widespread. It has no boundaries, and it no longer is harassment but something far worse: systematic abuse. It happens in the workplace more often than it is revealed. This is dirty warfare. 

I first noticed it two years and a half ago or so, but it may have been there all along. I've written casually about it. Perhaps not here, but it has surfaced, showing its ugly face here and there. At work, in the subway, it seems casual that people react to provocative actions. Social media's bullying may fall under a similar phenomenon, bullying there is on a moment-to-moment basis. 

Ever wonder why there are no cameras in the subway cars in New York? There are cameras in the station, on the platform where you await the arrival of trains. If you've ridden the subway, perhaps you experienced it or maybe even seen episodes of unreported violence there. I've witnessed people attacked, targeted; in social media, there are video-recorded accounts on such instances. A lady who had a face of having very few friends was riding one day, along with many other people, when a complete stranger, out of nowhere, attacked her. The lady, ashamed, simply got off the next station. 

Thinking back now, I also remember an incident in which a man (again, a lonesome rider, who had his bag next to him on a seat next to him so as to avoid anyone from sitting next to him. This man had his eyes closed and his semblance was not that of a pleasing folk. Again, unfriendly, less than cordial, as many people in New York oftentimes are. But no reason to deserve what next happened to him. A big guy on a bike parked himself next to him and honked his bike's horn aloud. The man abruptly awoke, must've felt violated somehow, but seeing that the man with the bike stood next to him and looked the other way, he did not pay him much mind. Some of the passengers who observed the incident may have thought it rude but gave it no second thought. In fact, the man, now almost forcibly, closed his eyes. Again, the man honked his horn, and this time the man sitting asked if there was a problem. The bike man started to curse him out until the sitting man got up and walked away. The man in the bike whacked him from behind and a fight ensued. The man who was sitting with his eyes closed before got the worse of it. 

Other types of harassment aren't as obvious. At work, no matter how many times you ask others not to call you by a very particular social etiquette, continue to do so, with the excuse that it is a polite way to address an elder. Mind you: I am younger than some of them and older than others, but by the looks of it, I appear to be ten years younger. This all started when I lost almost forty pounds by switching to a plant-based diet. First, there were those who observed the change and sincerely congratulated me. Then there were those who started teasing me, some calling me "chemo", others "fruity", but never to my face, so I didn't pay much mind. 

Losing weight didn't only look, it felt even better. It was as if I had not only the excess weight but also the anger as well. Some people, too, noticed it. It was harder for me to lose my temper, I felt at ease and my attitude overall changed drastically for the better. I became in a word... nicer. What we eat has an impact on the way we feel. Walking around, more or less, at around 215 pounds, six feet one inch tall, I didn't consider myself morbidly obese or anything. I'd work out on and enough but kept on eating more than I should and consuming like most a lot of fat. Sometimes I brought my weight down to slightly over 200 pounds, but never below that. With the adoption of a plant-based diet, I dropped to just over 170 pounds, an ideal weight I did not sport since my mid-teens. I sleep better, write better, nothing extraordinary, but if there's one thing this sort of transformation can cause is envy. It was about vanity, initially, the reason why I wanted to lose weight, like the vast majority of us. And it was not out of moral conscience that I stopped eating meat. 

I had seen a documentary, What the Health? impacted me as well as countless others, especially the younger generations. Like we all do when we see atrocities in films, the slaughter aspect of the animals, the toll agriculture inflicts on the planet. But, as I said, initially my intention was to cut the fat, and that I did. Still today, my objective is not to sound the alarm about animal cruelty, it comes second to human health. The cruelty is not going to persuade any meat-eater to stop the slaughter; though cruelty is in and of itself awful, the average omnivore would rationalize that the meat is already there, that the meat is already there and available, etc. Creating consciousness about how unhealthy a habit is to eat animal products creates more dissent and stress than necessary, the meat-eating lover may accept it as a necessary evil. What we can do is live our lives healthy, accept others, and if they're open or curious as to how it is that you are fit, let them know. Trying to change others is a waste of time; it is hard enough changing yourself, and the realization that my writings do reflect this reality lies in that it is my literature, no one's forcing anyone to read it, and therefore it reflects my concerns about it. What's more, of all the writings I've amassed, specifically talking about it with passion happens, no doubt. It is invigorating to explore the subject because I find it fascinating, as some do and many others may not. It is not to let others know, my literature is a reflection of the person I am. And if others find any use in it, willing, but if not, there are plenty of other things to read, including here, just skip the page. The fact that it gets such a response has a lot to do with the reality of this matter, how pressing it is for us to transcend this way of life, as well as not drinking much alcohol or completely eradicating it, somewhere in between would be fine. But of all the things I've quit, animal products are the one thing I've never missed and have never gone back to. At least, not voluntarily, I may eat once in a while something that has some egg, or cheese accidentally, but I don't go overboard, immediately I recognize it because of how it makes me feel, even the smell and taste of it. I stop, drink some water, and that's that. 

Astoundingly, the minute I eliminated meat, dairy, eggs, and cheese from my diet, the weight came off as if a genie had snapped her fingers, just like magic. 

More surprising, I started to feel more... connected to living things. Trees in spring, the pouring rain, even insects... it became harder to kill insects. I don't downplay the immense suffering of animals in captivity. And there's no separation from their suffering, as the suffering caused to humans by it. As if there was karmic payback for doing so. 

I'd found myself walking home, careful not to step on some ants. This world is a living entity; we don't exist, we coexist. We need the air, the bees, the trees, and one another. The water, and all that life it fosters. You know these things, but not quite the way you intuit them once you walk the talk. And it wasn't like I was advertising, but my healthy ways did not sit well with those around. And it wasn't just envy. 

At the time, I worked at a corporate giant. My progress did not go unnoticed for those whose model of business thrived on sickness. Modern medicine doesn't cure anything if there's no return in value for it. Now all the pharmaceutical companies are rushing to come up with a vaccine in record time, but investing in prevention methods was never profitable, so it didn't matter to deal with it when it was still in the proverbial box. Even as the virus spread around the world, the response was timid, it facilitated its spread and we were ill-prepared for it. When the police brutality protests broke out in New York, it was clear what the government had really prepared for: there may have been a shortage of surgical masks for medical staff to treat the waves of infected, but the police force was well-equipped with helmets, tear-gas, and military-grade gear to quell the civilian outcry. 

Doctors seldom tell the patient to change their way of life or tell that if they quit smoking cigarettes and cut back on drinking consumption drastically it will significantly improve their condition; rarely do they make a committed emphasis on exercise, God forbid mention yoga or meditation, adopting better sleep habits, get along with others, don't stress about anything. What they readily have is a long list of medical procedures or prescription drugs readily available. 

Some may argue, it is up to you. I would argue that that is true, but people rarely make the connection between the deplorable way of life and sickness. No one mentions much that if you try to get along with others, and above all, eat nutritiously, everything that ails you suddenly vanishes. 

Adopting one of these things is good enough. But all of them at once, well... that's worth a whole lot more than half a million dollars. I don't think there's somehow who's tasted feeling this good that would give it away for the right amount of money. And so, bullying, harassment, social ostracising, these are the things those who see you as a threat to their tired model of disease, will cast on you. It works this way, the business is about stressing you out so that you go and drink more. It is about scaring people, so they feel the need to adopt poor coping mechanisms. Find what is it that kills the most in the world, and you'll see: it's not diabetes, not even cancer, it certainly isn't terrorism and it isn't coronavirus by a very long margin. It's heart disease. 

The culprit? Stressors in our lives. Keep people under the illusion that things are worse than they are, make them worry excessively, over what the future holds; whether there will be enough money to pay rent. These are the things that tear us apart little by little. Say you eat a strict vegan diet, and meditate no less than three hours a day; say that, on top of that, you exercise regularly without killing yourself at the gym, keeping more or less active. All of these things can be squandered if you stress yourself out and worry excessively, it can make a dent in an otherwise healthy lifestyle. Say you manage somehow to take things lightly, and not stress much over anything. What if, then, your significant other takes her anger on you? That right there can diminish your overall health, but not as much as all the other factors combine. You will find that people around will tease you, sort of poke fun, make off-hand comments, and being the collected soul that you are, in most respects, you let things slide. This, too, could be bad. You need, at some point, to make a stand. So as to put a stop to their deliberate attempt to destroy all of what you've worked so effortlessly for. Because no one I know can be complete without a little bit of fight in them. You fight the good fight, the fight that makes all the other fights go away, the one that puts a stop to all the indiscriminate little battles you'll face if you turn away. 

Because in order to be whole, more than all the wisdom in books, you need courage.